parenting teenagers

Kahani Ghar Ghar ki (Story of every home)

This is the story of every teenager at home. And this particular story revolves around a girl named Ritika. And something that happens during Valentine’s week.

Ritika was engrossed in her favourite Netflix series, when her mother asked her for her lunch box. After calling Ritika a number of times, her mother decided to search through her bag to get her lunch box. While searching she finds a small lovely teddy bear and a big bright and beautiful valentine’s day card, with some handwritten messages written on it.

Ritika?!” Mom said.

Yes?” replies Ritika distractedly

Where did you get this teddy bear from?!” Mom exclaims.

Assuming her mom is talking about the toy she got from the market a few days ago. Ritika says “I got it two days back from that shopkeeper. And guess what mom, I got an amazing discount!”

Shopkeeper?!” her mom says with a straight face.

Yes, nice guy really, very sweet!” says Ritika.

Ah, I see. How long has this been going on?” Mom.

I told you – two days back, you are not paying attention mom!I

I see. You got this card from him too? Messages also, he wrote it for free, it seems?!”

Ritika: Card…?

She then remembers that her school bag had some gifts and cards that her friend had kept there for Valentine’s Day, to give to someone special.

Ritika tries to explain to her mom but she is not ready to listen, instead scolds Ritika a lot. In the evening when her dad came from the office, the scolding continued. Ritika, later spends the whole evening feeling scared and stressed, unable to concentrate on her studies or prepare for the test that was supposed to happen the next day. She failed the test and her parents even blamed her for that too. This is the outcome in every home where parents and children don’t seem to be on the same wavelength, where they don’t communicate effectively.

Today’s generation has different requirements and needs which the parents need to understand, and need to see the situations from their children’s perspective. And here we will be discussing some points we need to remember at this juncture.

1. Communication is the bottom-line of a child and parent relationship, the way of communication is built by the parents from the beginning, what kind of environment they provide a child with and whether or not the child can feel secure in the relationship is dependent on how parents communicate. A parent should always provide a healthy environment with the right amount of care to let their child grow in a balanced way.

2. Authoritative Parenting is one of the best forms of parenting, it is the combination of allows a child to become confident, disciplined, self-reliant and well behaved. The child will be able to know what is good for him and what is not. He or she will be able to make his or her own decisions rather than relying on their parents or friends for assistance.

Teenagers with this sort of parenting experience less anxiety and depression.

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3. Parents should be the one to initiate and let their child feel free and secure to open up about their sexual relationship, and also provide them with the correct sex education.

Parents should make them feel comfortable talking about the changes the teenagers may experience as a result of puberty. They should speak openly about issues like menstruation, not just to girls but also to boys. Seeing their parents communicate to them in this manner will make them feel safe and encourage them to open up to them about their own problems.

4. Confidence Building – During the teenage years, a child will always want to walk on a new road to find his/her own identity which may include new friendships and a lot of new experiences that they are not yet familiar with. The role of parents here is to build confidence.

Another issue that may arise due to low confidence is Peer Pressure. Peer pressure occurs when you choose to do something you don’t want to do in order to fit in with society or your peers. As a result, many children develop drug addictions, smoking, consume alcohol, or engage in sexual behaviors. In such instances, a child’s parents should be the first one they turn to for assistance. A parent should listen to their child without judging them and keep the lines of communication open. They should also propose strategies for them to deal with their peers by establishing or increasing their confidence.

Children go through a lot of changes during their teenage years, and if communication is not maintained in a healthy way, the relationship is bound to have ups and downs, teenagers need a lot of care and support from their parents, as well as a safe space where they can feel secure enough to express themselves.

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